Every child has an 'inner life'. How often parents stop to observe what our children are thinking and what they want? You may get a wake up call one day when your child say, "Daddy, you don't respect me, I don't respect you". Most parent are too engross in instructing, telling or 'teaching' their children to do the 'right' way and are quick to 'correct' any actions or words that are deem not 'right' or out of expectation. In the haste to bring things right, most often words spoken to children were not respectful of their feelings, thus creating a lot of anger and tensions between parents and children. Sometimes in the fit of anger, parents may
grab a cane or whatever that can incur pain on the children, slash and hit onto the children, sometimes not on legs and hands but all over the body and to regret later. Great damage has been done onto the children and a new limit is been set in the children's mind on how far they can be punished. Most often the children do not know where their mistake lie, except knowing their parents are unhappy with their actions or words. So most of their actions and results are based on their parents mood and happiness. Children learn faster from their "inner thinking'.If we are able to change their thinking in the most gentle way, their actions will be changed, thus the
results. You may call or even scold your child to brush his teeth before sleep,maybe you will just get him into action for while but the habits will not change permanently. Your child may have the habits of not flushing the toilet after use until even after leaving school or likes to eat in excess despite of countless scoldings and warnings. You may be surprised that all these old habits may change suddenly after been 'influenced' by some friends or experiences. So where is the change? Clearly at the thinking or mental stage.
